Happy Holidays Folks, I hope this story brings a little holiday cheer into your life! Thank you for all your praises, suggestions, and criticisms! Let's not forget--persistence. I'm going to dedicated this story to my dedicated readers and for my dear editor/friend Ed, hope to see you back soon!

Chapter 9: Rough Patches

I glanced over at my clock, 9:32. Good grief, this stupid movie is still going! I tried keeping my eyes open, but a yawn betrayed me. I tried to conceal my yawn…too late.

“I knew you’d hate this movie,” Tyler remarked.

“No no no, I like it,” I replied, pretending to care. “I’m just tired.”

“And bored,” he added, slightly annoyed

Sure, his taste movies differ from mine. He likes action films, James Bond and Jackie Chan, and I’m more of the romance and comedy type of guy, chick flicks and crude humor. So movie nights, such as tonight, always have us end up fighting or arguing.

“No, I’m not bored,” I said, a bit defensive. “Can’t a guy yawn anymore without being ridiculed?”

“So NOW I’m ridiculing you?” he responded.

“Oh Tyler, stop it!” I replied. “Watch the movie or pause it or stop it for all I care!”

He picks up the controller and presses stop.

“I’m going to go home,” he said, sulking.

“Fine,” I sighed. “Be a big baby about it.”

“I will!”

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

He picked up his stuff and left. I threw myself onto my bed in frustration and screamed into my pillow. The honeymoon period is definitely over for Tyler and me, I thought sadly. It’s been almost a year since he kissed me under the mistletoe, and I thought I was on top of the world. As I laid on my bed, I reflected over the last few months:

Ryan walked out of my room, and I chased after him. He gave me a cold stare that still sends chill down my spine everytime I envision it. It was a stare of sadness, anger, and a hint of hatred. After that, he didn’t talk to me. I continued to hang out with Clarissa, Jacob, and Ryan. They sense a rift between Ryan and me; yet, they did not understand the background of the situation. Pretty soon, the group had an empty feeling. Eventually, around March, it broke up. Clarissa moved onto the cheerleaders and jocks crowd, Jacob and Ryan hung out with some drama and band people. I stuck by Tyler, moving with Clarissa into the jock circle. Clarissa and I still talk, but it didn’t have the same feeling. There was awkwardness, perhaps some uneasiness.

The year ended pretty much with our group of four splitting into two groups, and Ryan continuing to ignore my calls and conversations in class. Eventually, I gave up. Jacob and I ran for student body president and vice president and won easily. Now, I have a new workload, but I still get to work with Jacob in student government. I continued to hang around Tyler, making that guy the center of my universe. He was tender, caring, and patient. It’s been almost a year, and we haven’t initiated anything past the making out and groping. Sometimes, an occasional hand job. I guess he was getting rather frustrated, and his attitude changed completely. It wasn’t completely hostile, but it was not the same Tyler I fell in love with a year ago.

Then the summer arrived, Tyler’s family found out about us. His dad wasn’t too keen at first, but he accepted it. His mom hugged me so tightly, that I was beginning to lose my oxygen supply. Then, Tyler went away to visit colleges. He pleaded for me to come with him, but I realized I could use a few days away from him. Well, days turned into weeks, and Tyler didn’t return until late August. I missed him a lot, but something about him changed when he got back. He got darker, from the sun, and his hair lightened. He looked more physically fit than before, and he was taller and broader. I had my fair share of the sun, but I didn’t turn into some Greek statue over the summer. He didn’t even call me until a few days before school and said hello. He came over, and he gave me a long kiss. It was not a kiss of passion, but one of hunger and lust. His hand got rather aggressive, roaming around my body. I started to feel uncomfortable, and I stopped our kiss.

“Jesus Christ!” he said, frustratingly. “When are WE ever going to do it?”

“Do what?” I asked, a bit nieve.

“SEX,” Tyler responded. “You know, sexual intercourse?”

“Just a BIT louder,” I replied sarcastically. “I’m sure my whole household would love to hear you talk about our sex lives.”

“WHAT sex lives?” he retorted. “We don’t have a sex life, we have making out and touching. That’s all middle school stuff.”

“I’m sorry,” I answered with annoyance. “Would you like to rip off my clothes and fuck me on my bed right now?”

“Forget I mentioned anything,” he said. “I have to get home for dinner.”

“Nice seeing you too,” I said.

He left, and I threw myself face down onto my bed and laid there.

School started in September, and senior year provided us with a large workload. I began to notice Tyler’s attitude towards me has changed. He rarely cast his eyes on me, instead, he would keep looking at his jock friends or even the slutty cheerleaders. I’ve even caught him staring at Clarissa a few times. Then, I got really uncomfortable. Our hangouts usually ended up, like tonight, in an argument. I didn’t even sense any love between us, and I still cannot figure out why we stay together.

Why do I even try, I thought frustratingly. I looked back at my clock, 9:43.

“Dwayne!” Ben yelled.

“What?”

“Your turn to take the trash out,” he screamed back.

“Fine,” I replied tiredly. “I’ll take it out in a few minutes.”

Ben did not respond, instead, he knocked on my door.

“Come in,” I responded.

“Did you get into another fight with Tyler?”

“How did you guess?” I retorted sarcastically.

“What was it over this time?” Ben asked. “Whose side of the bed he gets?”

“I don’t know,” I replied. “I think the movie genre was a big part of it tonight.”

Ben hopped onto my bed and laid down next to me.

“Why do you even bother?”

“Bother what?” I asked.

“Staying with Tyler,” he replied. “He’s sort of an ass now.”

“You’re just exaggerating,” I said, defending my boyfriend.

“Well, I hear he’s got a good chance for a scholarship at UCLA,” he replied.

“Probably,” I said, remembering the time on the bridge:

Tyler yells back, “FUCK my basketball scholarship...i won't be getting one...because I don't play well enough for Stanford or UCLA or any of the "BIG" guys....there, happy? Someone you despise and hate...has no future or life...call THAT ambitious?”

I thought to myself sadly, I’ve always had faith in you, Ty.

“I say you move on,” Ben suggested, snapping me out of my thoughts. “He’s not the right guy for you.”

“What do YOU know about love?” I retorted jokingly.

“More than you, thank you,” he said, leaping off my bed to give a courteous bow. “I’m Dear Abby trapped in a male body.”

I laughed. It felt good to laugh, and I haven’t laughed in a while.

“Maybe you’ve got a point there Benny,” I piped up.

“I always do,” he said. “Just listen to what your heart says and base your decision on that.”

“I think you’re onto something,” I said, impressively. “You want to take the trash out for me?”

“Not a chance,” Ben said, as he left my room.

I got up and walked down to the kitchen. My mom finished the last of the dinner dishes and tied the trash bag.

“Here you go Dway,” she said, handing me the bag. “Tyler left here in a hurry again, are you guys fighting?”

“Again, yes,” I said, with a sigh.

I left the kitchen and opened the front door. I walked out onto the patio, and the cold air surrounded me. I gave a slight shiver and hurried to the garbage bins in the side yard. I threw the lid onto the bins and turned the corner to walk up the patio. In the dim light, I see Tyler sitting on the steps.

“Tyler, what are you doing outside?” I asked. “It’s freakin’ cold out here, and you’re going to catch a cold.”
Great, not only am I a pathetic boyfriend, but I’m a mother as well.

“Dwayne, we just need to talk.”

I took a deep breath in, and I knew what was coming.

“I haven’t been fair to you,” he began.

Wow, I was not expecting that line.

He continued, “Last summer, I went to visit my cousins down in L.A. when I visited UCLA and UCSD, right?”

“Right…” I responded slowly.

Tyler started to tear up, and I started to be afraid.

“What’s wrong?” I said. “Why are you crying?”

“There’s this college guy…and we did stuff…and I cheated on you…” he said in between sobs.

“Huh…” I replied, in a daze.

“It just happened, and I couldn’t stop it. I’d take it all back Dway.”

“Hmm…” I responded, still in a daze.

“I felt so guilty, and then I just got frustrated…”

“Just please stop,” I said, holding a finger up to silence him.

I got up and paced around the patio. Tears were starting to well up, but I did not cry. I will not cry for him, I was stronger than that.

“Did you use protection?” I asked him, locking eye contact.

His teary eyes stared back and said, “Yes, I was safe.”

I let out a breath of relief, “I’m glad you were safe at least.”

“Yeah…” he responded uneasily. “Do you hate me now?”

“I don’t hate you,” I replied.

“You don’t?” he asked, surprised.

“I haven’t been a very good boyfriend,” I started. “I held out for too long, I guess I was never ready.”

“No no no…” he replied pleadingly. “It really wasn’t you, it was me. I wasn’t ready either, but then I just adjusted.”

“Yea…well,” I answered. “I’m not a big jock like you…guess I can’t adjust as well or as fast as you.”

“Oh Dwayne…” he said. “I’ll do anything to make it up to you…”

“I better get inside,” I said. “It’s awfully cold outside. I think you should get home Ty, before you catch something.”
I got up slowly and without looking back, I left him sitting on my porch. I walked up the stairs in a slight daze, and I bumped into Jane.

“Watch it!” Jane said, then she stopped when she saw my face. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” I said, and brushed past her.

I sauntered into my room and closed the door behind me. I sat on my bed, and the first tear fell from my eyes onto the cold, hardwood floor.

“Shit,” I cursed bitterly. “I’m not going to cry like some pathetic fuck.”

The door opened and Ben and Jane came in. They sat by me and enveloped me into a deep, affectionate hug.

“Let it out Dway,” Jane said soothingly, stroking my hair.

“No!” I responded stubbornly. “I won’t cry! I won’t…I won’t…”

And the dam burst. I cried on Jane’s shoulder for almost ten minutes, meanwhile, Ben continued to pat my back. I wiped away the tears and attempted to stand up.

“No, you sit tight,” Jane said. “I’ll go get you a glass of water.”

“Thanks,” I mumbled.

“What happened?” Ben inquired. “You can tell me, you know you can trust me.”

“I trust you,” I said. “I just don’t want to talk about it.”

Jane appeared with a glass of water, “Here you go Dway, now tell us what’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” I replied.

“You didn’t drench my new blouse for nothing, so spill, or you can pay for my dry-cleaning.”

“Dry-cleaning is pretty hefty this holiday season,” Ben commented. “So I’d just take the primer choice.”

“He cheated on me,” I said simply.

Jane and Ben’s expression softened.

“With who?”

“I don’t even know, some college guy,” I responded. “I don’t want to discuss it anymore, I’ll just get more frustrated.”

“All right, just sleep on it,” Ben suggested. “Maybe you need a good sleep, but please don’t do anything irrational.”

“I won’t,” I said. “Promise.”

“Good,” Jane responded with a smile. “Because it’s your turn to take out the trash this week. And if anything happens to you, then the chore wheel changes!”

“Oh shut up!” I said, throwing a pillow at Jane.

Jane ducked, and the pillow hit Ben on the back of the head.

“That’s it,” Ben said. “You’re soooo dead.”

And the Carmichael children went into an intense pillow fight, and after ten minutes, we fell onto my bed in exhaustion.

“I’m going to change into my PJs,” my sister said. “I’ll sleep in here tonight.”

“Yeah, me too,” Ben said. “I’ll just go brush my teeth.”

I smiled and watched my siblings leave my room, and I was thankful to have such a loving family. Fifteen minutes later, we slipped into PJs and brushed our teeth, and we crawled into my queen-size bed and fell asleep.

 

“You ok?” my dad asked me during breakfast.

“I’ll be fine,” I muttered, taking a spoonful of Cocoa Puffs into my mouth.

“I almost had a heart attack when Jane and Ben weren’t in their room,” my mom commented. “But I found them all in one bed, fast asleep.”

“Mom, you make it all mushy,” Ben whined. “NOT a word to anyone about this, I can’t afford to lose my image.”
The whole family broke into laughter, and Ben gave a slight pout.

It was nearly one, and I took a shower and told my mom that I was taking a walk to the bridge. I stared at the pavement as I strolled slowly to the bridge. Someone was all ready there when I got to the park. It was Ryan. Ryan looked up, and his face lit up for a split second.

“Hi,” I said, giving him a greeting.

“Hey,” he replied.

“I take it you’re talking to me?” I said, as I sat down next to him on the bench.

“It was just a courteous response,” he said. “Don’t wet your pants.”

“All right,” I said, as I stared ahead.

“What are you doing out here anyways?” he asked. “Shouldn’t you be with loverboy?”

“You mean loverboy who cheated on me?” I retorted.

Ryan’s smirk melted into a look of instant regret and sorrow.

“Hey, man, I’m sorry…I didn’t know,” he said. “I wouldn’t have said such a harsh thing.”

“It’s ok, I know,” I said, sadly.

We sat there in silence for a few more minutes, before I spoke up again, “Ok, Ry, I’ll admit it. I miss you, damn it.”

Ryan sat in contemplative silence for a few more moments and said, “I miss you too.”

“Yeah?” I said, turning to face him.

He turned and looked at me, “Yeah, scout’s honor.”

I laughed, “We’re not in scouts dummy.”

“I can still reserve the right to say it,” he said, feigning a dramatic pose. “Free speech.”

“Stop it drama queen,” I said, chuckling.

Then we grew serious again, and I said, “I’m sorry for being an ass. I wish I prioritized better, but I never thought that going out with Tyler would end our group or us.”

“I don’t think any of us knew what was happening,” he replied. “But I wish we didn’t wait this long to patch things up.”

“I tried,” I protested.

“Yeah, too bad I’m stubborn,” he said.

“Yeah, too bad,” I commented.

“Shut up,” he said, as he jokingly punched me. “So…how are you holding up?”

“I’m doing ok actually,” I stated. “Still sad, maybe a little angry.”

I told him all the details, and he listened intently. He nodded and piped up with a few suggestions and comments. We were talking like two old friends again, and the ten-month gap was non-existent. Two hours had pass, as we caught each other up with our lives.

“Hey, want to go rent a cheesy chick flick and throw popcorn at the screen?” he asked, his face lighting up.

“Sounds good,” I agreed.

I held out my pinky, “Friends?”

He linked back with his pinky, “Forever.”

Standing a few feet behind them, silently, was Tyler. He hasn’t seen Dwayne this happy in a long time. I robbed his happiness, Tyler thought sadly and miserably. I hope you’ll find some way in your heart to forgive me, Tyler hoped. He stood silently as he observed the two old friends get up and disappear around the corner.